Project 2
Student id: v27
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<DOC>
<docHead>
<!--required header includes metadata about the assignment (title, author, version)-->
<title>Project 2 - Djordje</title>
<author xml:id="v_26">Djordje Vlajkovic</author>
<version n="2" date="2016-08-09"/>
</docHead>
<pub_init_proposal>
<cover_page>
<title>Tennis Court Building Initiative</title>
<author>Djordje Vlajkovic</author>
<submit_date>8/9/2016</submit_date>
<audience>Boston City Council</audience>
</cover_page>
<tbl_cont>
<section n="1"> Introduction </section>
<section n="2"> Background </section>
<section n="3"> Purpose </section>
<section n="4"> Approach </section>
<section n="5"> Feasibility </section>
<section n="6"> Conclusion </section>
<section n="7"> References </section>
</tbl_cont>
<intro type="ltr_int">
<p>In Boston, there are a variety of public areas where one can choose to participate in
sports. But for some sports, it is more difficult to find a place to play, tennis
being one of them. Because of the lack of courts in the city and crowdedness of the
existing courts, many people are unable to have the opportunity to play. This leaves
many limited options on when and where they can play. The premise of this
proposal<note type="instructor" resp="#kgs">you are missing a verb in this
sentence, probably "is"</note> to expand the number of tennis courts in the
city, so that more individuals can have the opportunity to participate in the
sport.</p>
</intro>
<background>
<p>
<crnt_cond> In today's Boston, there are a few places where someone can go out and
play a game of tennis<note type="instructor" resp="#kgs">do you have any
information on how many courts there are?</note>. But from the already
limited amounts of courts in the city and the courts that are owned by private
facilities, there are not many options for the public to choose from<note
type="instructor" resp="#kgs">again, some data would be helpful here, are
there particular neghborhoods that have more or less?</note>. For the courts
that are available to the public, they usually fill quickly and may be out of
the way for some. These factors make it difficult for people to go out with a
friend and play a game of tennis. </crnt_cond> With these kinds of existing
issues, it seems unfair that the average person can't just go out and have a good
time at the tennis courts without worrying about where or when to go. <subj_hist> In
the United States, tennis is a sport with smaller community that belongs to the
very talented or those who are reasonably wealthy enough to afford the necessary
equipment, lessons, and facilities that are usually required to play the sport.
But for those individuals who do not have the luxury of falling into those
categories, it leaves them from experiencing the sport. </subj_hist>
</p>
</background>
<purpose>
<p>What we hope to achieve at the end of this project is to give the community more
opportunities to play tennis<note type="instructor" resp="#kgs">why tennis? why not
basketball? or squash or volleyball? This would seem to be an important part of
the purpose to me.</note>. Looking ahead at the scheduling for this project,
<scope type="when">the expected time table would probably be over the course of
a few months to half a year. If everything goes accordingly, the tennis courts
should be ready by spring of next year. </scope> In terms of an overall
objective, <objective> we are insisting on is building four to six tennis court
sites throughout the Back Bay area<note type="instructor" resp="#kgs"/>why this
area?. These courts would all be nicely furnished and reflect a high standard in
condition. </objective> The benefits a project like this bring are: <goal> the
reduction of crowded courts throughout the city, uptick in the amount of
individuals playing tennis, convenience of location for many and increase in the
opportunities to lead a healthier lifestyle. </goal>
</p>
</purpose>
<approach>
<!--attribute options: execution, action-->
<p>
<action>The first step in the project would be getting the proposal approved by the
city council. Once the project is green lit, we will come up with a budget of
roughly $15 million to accommodate the tasks and resources that will be
necessary to the completion of these tennis courts. Once receiving approval on
the budget, the next phase would be to buy up areas around the city and get the
proper legal paperwork that will enable us to work without any issues. From
there, a construction company will be hired and begin work once all of the
necessary documentation has been set in order. After construction is wrapped up,
necessary precautions will be made to see that all safety regulations are met
and that all of the courts meet regulation sizes. </action>
</p>
</approach>
<feasibility>
<!--attribute options: economic, social, environmental-->
<p>
<environmental> One of the main obstacles to this project will be finding the right
areas to build these courts. The first thing to make sure of would be building
these courts away from other existing courts in the city<note type="instructor"
resp="#kgs">this begs the question, again, of why Back Bay?</note>. The
other parameters for location would be finding a place in the city where it
would be easily accessible for anyone. This means minimal traffic around the
area and multiple entrances and exits. The main obstacle that will come with
building these courts will be obtaining the necessary zoning and construction
permits<note type="instructor" resp="#kgs">The funding won't be an
issue?</note>. But if we can find the right area to build and meet all of
the requirements given by the city, this project will be possible.<note
type="instructor" resp="#kgs">this is a small point, but is possibility the
same thing as feasibility?</note>
</environmental>
</p>
</feasibility>
<conclu>
<p> Building these courts will give people throughout the city<note type="instructor"
resp="#kgs">but especially in Back Bay</note> more chances to play tennis and
introduce others to the sport. It will provide many with a more convenient locations
and give people who may have lacked the opportunity before to play. This project
will also give people another way to stay active and maintain a healthier lifestyle.
Lastly it will lead to a resurgence in the popularity of tennis as a sport in
Boston. Overall this opportunity will lead to renaissance for tennis within the
community and give opportunities for many to play whenever.<note type="instructor"
resp="#kgs">why is this good for the city?</note>
</p>
</conclu>
<references>
<citation n="1" style="MLA">Lawrence, Merlisa. "Why Is American Tennis Dying?" Bleacher
Report. N.p., 21 Nov. 2013. Web. 01 Aug. 2016.</citation>
<citation n="2" style="MLA">Sopher, Philip. "Explaining the U.S. Tennis Slump." The
Atlantic. Atlantic Media Company, 22 Aug. 2014. Web. 01 Aug. 2016.</citation>
<citation n="3" style="MLA">"Tennis Court Construction Basics." Tennis Court and Play
Court Construction Basics, Dimensions. N.p., n.d. Web. 07 Aug. 2016.</citation>
</references>
</pub_init_proposal>
<docReview>
<reviewer type="peer" xml:id="d13">Daniel Doherty</reviewer>
<report type="peer" resp="#d13">
<p>This proposal suggests that the sport of tennis is not easily accessible for many
citizens of Boston as a result of a variety of economic, cultural and logistical
factors that have resulted in the sport only being enjoyed by a select group of the
population. It mainly focused on the logistical fact that there are not enough
public courts in the city, which has prevented many people from having a chance to
try the sport of tennis as there are no courts close enough to their neighborhoods
and the ones that do exist are overcrowded.</p>
<p>This proposal contains the necessary information and content of the genre but can be
improved upon by the addition of additional details in the approach and feasibility
sections. By adding detail to the expected costs of the project and which areas of
the city would benefit most from the construction of tennis courts, the project
would have more depth of analysis by highlighting the benefits the addition courts
could provide. You state, "The other parameters for location would be finding a
place in the city where it would be easily accessible by anyone, having minimal
traffic around the area, and having it in a safer area." What specific areas in the
city meet this criteria and why are these three things important to the success of
the project. I believe some further discussion of this aspect of the project would
greatly contribute to the strength of your argument.</p>
<p>At certain times in the proposal, specifically in the introduction and background,
the sentences do not flow well from one to another. Simply, there are many times
when a sentence ends rather abruptly, and the next sentence starts with the word but
or and, adding a qualifying statement for the sentence prior. By combining the
sentences that relate to each other, the document will flow better and reduce
unnecessary verbiage. Additionally, the sentences in this proposal are mostly
passive statements, using phases like "probably would", "but if we" and so on. The
genre of a proposal is at its most basic level a call to action, and using passive
words weaken the argument by introducing some uncertainty into the situation. In the
conclusion, you switch to using statements like "this project will" which gives the
proposal a more powerful and convincing tone and I think you can use more of this
throughout the document.</p>
<p>One final suggestions is to perform some additional proofreading, specifically for
grammar throughout the document. There are some sentences that word things
awkwardly. This draft of a proposal is a strong start that could benefit with some
additional information to expand upon the approach and benefits of implementation,
and some editing to improve the flow of the proposal.</p>
</report>
<reviewer type="instructor" xml:id="kgs"/>
<report type="instructor" resp="#kgs">
<p>There is a lot going well here. I think the topic and audience make sense for the
genre. I think, on the whole, I would have liked to have seen a bit more
justification for the specific proposal: why tennis and not some other sport? why
Back Bay and not, perhaps, some less affluent neighborhoods? Pay close attention to
the notes I added above in-text. Good work here.</p>
</report>
</docReview>
</DOC>